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Breaking news! There is a new type of virus we fear could become the next global pandemic! We know very little about this new disease currently, we have patient 0 in quarantine for monitoring and testing but are currently unsure how this virus started or how it’s spreading, but we fear it has already spread out of control. Scientists are theorizing this new virus may be a result of porn consumption! It may have started off that way, but for all we know it may now be airborne! We are advising all men to stay locked inside and for the women in their lives to strictly monitor any online activity as this may be where it starts, and it seems to only be affecting men at this point. This virus is causing very strange symptoms in men, incurable horniness, constant boners, physical dependance on porn and jerking off, sexy hallucinations…. Please contact authorities if you find yourself experiencing any of these symptoms or fear you may have been exposed to this virus!
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