You're Not Man Enough

We've been dating for a few months, but I can't do this anymore. I called you to come over to dump you. I tried so hard to make this work, and overlook all the things wrong with you, but I just can't do this anymore. I am so out of your league, and I am sick of settling just because you're "nice". That's not enough to keep a girl like Me! You haven't really done anything wrong, besides not being man enough for Me, so I'm not going to boot you from My life entirely. I know you're desperate to stay in My life, so I'll give you one option to stay in it- as My slave. You will dedicate your life to pleasing Me, pledge to stop dating and never waste another woman's time, and get ready to please some of the men who ARE man enough for Me ;)